Living in Love After Living in Survival
In this powerful, vulnerable episode, Colinda takes us through her story to and through survival mode—from being the youngest of six in a tiny northern Canadian town, to growing up in poverty, dealing with abandonment, family addiction, abuse, and unresolved grief. Every man in her life left. Her home was chaotic. Her body carried trauma long before she had the language for it. Survival mode turned her into the peacekeeper, the fixer, and the overachiever—pushing herself, people-pleasing, and constantly trying to be “better” so she could finally feel worthy of love. Decades later, after a near breakdown and a literal collision with a pole, she began the long, messy process of learning what self-love actually looks like in practice. We talk about self-awareness, reprogramming, and reinvention; how affirmations and afformations started rewiring her beliefs; and how a 31-day challenge of ten daily acts of love became the foundation of her methodology and her book Living in Love. This is not a fluffy, Pinterest self-love chat. This is self-love as rebellion for women whose nervous systems were built on “you are not enough.”
🧠 What We Talk About
- How survival mode showed up for Colinda:
- people-pleasing
- fixing everyone else
- overachieving
- never listening to her body
- The impact of:
- a father who left and never came back
- poverty and unsafe living conditions
- a sibling’s addiction, prison, and early death
- inappropriate touch and boundary violations inside the family
- Emotional neglect and being raised by a mother who gave everything to the community and almost nothing to herself or her kids
- How trauma translated into:
- dating narcissistic partners
- proving worth through doing
- constant burnout and nervous system overload
- The mirror moment: walking into a pole, seeing her own eyes, and realizing how deeply unhappy she truly was
- The beginning of healing: meditation, Louise Hay mirror work, tapping, and slowly changing her self-talk
- The role of forgiveness (especially of her sister) – not as excusing harm, but as releasing its power over her
- How grief during COVID and her sister’s passing cracked her open to the question:
- “What do I want to be?” → “I want to be love.”
- “What do I want this book to be?” → “I want this book to bring love.”
- The 31-day challenge: 10 acts of love a day and how it shifted her nervous system, her relationships, and her sense of worth
- The difference between affirmations and afformations, and how positive questions helped her brain find proof she was worthy of love
- How to begin building deservability and self-worth when you don’t believe you deserve anything good
- Why healing is ongoing: trauma like grief, integration instead of erasure, and giving yourself permission to release what no longer needs to lead
🗝️ Key Takeaways
“Survival mode for me was exhausting—constantly fixing, pleasing, and never feeling good enough.”
“I didn’t treat myself well because deep down, I didn’t believe I deserved to be treated well.”
“Sometimes you can’t start with ‘I love you’—you start with ‘I’m ready to be ready to love myself.’”
“You are love, just by existing. You don’t need to earn what you already are.”
🔗 Connect with Colinda
- 🌐 Website: ColindaLatour.com
- 📖 Book: Living in Love – available on Amazon and major online retailers
- 🎥 YouTube: Living in Love with Colinda
- 💌 Living in Love Movement (launching September): a free global movement to help create 10 million acts of love
