Episode 26

full
Published on:

19th Aug 2025

Strong Black Woman? Or Silently Drowning?

In this raw, tell-it-all episode, Shanti Refuge peels back the layers of pain, pressure, and generational programming that led to her 2018 breakdown—and the radical self-rescue that followed.

You’ll hear:

  • The dark cloud moment that started it all
  • Why antidepressants weren’t her answer—and what was
  • How journaling became her lifeline (and her business)
  • Why most Black women don’t recognize they’re in survival mode
  • The truth about healing that nobody tells us

🎙️ What We Talk About:

  • Living with undiagnosed trauma (and not even knowing it’s trauma)
  • Why strong Black women don’t get help—and how that kills us slowly
  • The dangers of normalizing dysfunction just because it’s familiar
  • How to know when it’s not just a bad day, but a breaking point
  • The shift from surviving to thriving (without meds, shame, or silence)
  • Building a business from your healing
  • Reclaiming softness, rest, and radical ownership


🔑 Key Takeaways:

“I didn’t know I was traumatized—I thought I was just strong.”
“We can’t heal in the same environment that hurt us.”
“Your mama ain’t always your support system.”
“If journaling saved my life, it can sure as hell save yours.”


🙌 Why This Episode Matters:

This conversation rips the lid off generational survival, especially for Black women who’ve been taught to shut up, keep moving, and never show pain.

Shanti’s story is both a mirror and a roadmap—proof that healing is possible even when you start from rock bottom.

This is the kind of raw truth we don’t hear enough.

But today? We’re hearing it loud and clear.


💬 Connect with Shanti:


Website: www.shantirefuge.com

Instagram | TikTok | Facebook: @ShantiRefugeJournals

Podcast: Quiet Is Kept

Book: Quiet Is Kept – Available now on her website and Amazon


🔗 Resources & Links:



Next Episode All Episodes Previous Episode

Listen for free

Show artwork for Survival Mode Disrupted with Leticia R Francis

About the Podcast

Survival Mode Disrupted with Leticia R Francis
Disrupted Unapologetic Conversations about Survival Mode
Survival Mode Disrupted is not just a podcast. It's a rebellion.

A raw, unfiltered space where we finally stop pretending we're fine and start telling the truth—the truth about the trauma we've carried, the identities they had to wear to survive, and the radical decisions we made to break free.

Because here's the deal: survival mode isn’t just a season. It’s a damn identity. One that so many were forced to adopt just to get through life, to stay safe, to stay needed, to stay sane. But eventually, it starts costing you more than it protects. Your peace. Your purpose. Your power.

This podcast is for the disruptors—the people who were told to stay small, stay silent, stay grateful for crumbs… and said “hell no.”

Hosted by Leticia, The Survival Mode Disruptor herself—a trauma recovery mentor, speaker, and woman who has lived through the fires of abuse, betrayal, and breakdown and still chose to rise—this show dives deep into the unapologetic exits from survival mode that no one talks about.

You’ll hear from women (and a few brave men) who walked away from toxic relationships, soul-sucking careers, generational dysfunction, religious trauma, cultural expectations, and the lies they were taught to believe about themselves. Not because it was easy—but because staying would’ve killed something sacred inside of them.

These are the stories of bold pivots, quiet courage, and messy but miraculous rebirths.

Each episode is a conversation—a disruption—meant to wake something up in you. Whether it’s a guest sharing the moment they chose themselves for the first time, or Leticia dropping a truth bomb that makes you question everything you’ve normalized, this podcast is here to shake the foundation of your survival mode identity and replace it with something truer. Something freer.

We’re not here for surface-level self-care tips or fake empowerment slogans.

We’re here to talk about what it really takes to:

Reclaim your voice after being silenced.

Reinvent yourself after being broken down.

Rewrite your story when everyone else wants you to stay the same.

Release the guilt of choosing YOU.

This is for those who are done performing. Done pleasing. Done pretending.

It’s for the ones ready to exit survival mode—not slowly, not quietly, but disruptively and unapologetically.

You won’t leave this podcast the same.
You’ll cry. You’ll rage. You’ll laugh.
You’ll see yourself in every story.
And more importantly, you’ll remember who the hell you are.

Welcome to Survival Mode Disrupted.
It’s not just a podcast.
It’s a movement.
And your exit begins here.

About your host

Profile picture for Leticia Francis

Leticia Francis

I am not here to inspire you—I am here to activate you.

As a Survivor, Keynote Speaker, and Trauma Recovery Mentor, I know what it’s like to fight battles no one sees. I also know that breaking free is possible. My work is about disrupting survival mode, exposing trauma-driven success cycles, and giving women the blueprint to reclaim their lives.

🔹 200+ podcast features & speaking engagements
🔹 Global Women of Choice Award Winner 2022
🔹 Creator of the Survival Mode Exit Plan
🔹 Host of Survival Mode Disrupted Podcast